Musings of an Inappropriate Woman

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The best of the rest of the internet

A short but sweet collection of links on feminism, creativity and the politics of everyday life.

Low-Commitment projects: making stuff happen with little time and energy. (Low-Commitment Projects)

Hilarious. The Purity Bear will cock block you until you’re married. (Jezebel)

Why #mtrsues is good for feminism. (The News With Nipples)

"Tory feminism" is feminism for the 1%. (The F Word)

The real advantage rich kids have is the confidence that they’ll be “okay”. (Penelope Trunk)

"The [high fashion] waif is thus chosen not as a type with a great sex appeal to men, but rather as an exaggerated version of what insecure women feel they ought to look more like." (What Would Phoebe Do)

What do your shoes say about you? Mine say I’m a peasant. (Final Fashion)

Why Liz Lemon needs a divorce from Tina Fey. (Bitch Magazine)

Out of the mouths of US Presidential candidates comes… Shit Homophobic People Say. (Lost at E Minor)

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If you read one thing this weekend, make it Tami Winfrey Harris’s Not everyone is laughing at Shit White Girls Say To Black Girls:

The discussion is hard because it requires good, well-meaning people to admit to and examine their own racial privilege. It requires those who may think of themselves as anti-racist allies to do more than tsk tsk along with black friends about some madness, say, Rick Santorum said, and recall the things they personally (and perhaps innocently) may have done to make friends, family and co-workers of color feel othered. That’s tough. And it’s not just tough for the “white girls” mentioned in Ramsey’s work. It’s hard for everyone who has any kind of privilege, be it educational privilege, sexual privilege, gender privilege, etc. (Clutch Magazine)

Jon Hamm, via Mademoiselle Robot.

How to own your privilege and not be a jerkface about it. (The Gloss)

"Mommy, they are just like me." «« One of many reasons representations of gay people in pop culture matter. (And this is my blog…)

Why you usually look like crap in other people’s Facebook photos. (Gawker)

The euro crisis isn’t really about money. It’s about the fiction that Europeans ever existed at all. (Foreign Policy)

Grieving the loss of your body fantasy:

We talk about grief in regards to losing those that we love or having to give up possessions or places by necessity of circumstance. Less often, you will hear people talking openly about the grief that they experience at having to give up a notion of themselves that they clung to for dear life. (Medicinal Marzipan)

And while we’re at it, we may as well grieve the fact that we’re never going to look the way we do in our own mirrors, either:

One of the biggest things I learned during my mirror fast was exactly how much I do control what I see in the mirror: My “mirror face,” for starters, which ensures I’ll always be seeing a wider-eyed, poutier-lipped version of myself than what you might see when you look at me. Then there’s makeup, hairstyles, lighting, angles… (The Beheld)

How to deal with copycats and idea thieves. (Productive Flourishing)

But there are some good reasons not to laugh at the “Shit girls say” meme that spawned it. (Feministing)

Of all the responses to my Melinda Tankard Reist profile last weekend, this analysis felt the most dead-on:

It’s this strong line up of critical voices which shows us the magazine (and Hills in her blog) sees that running a profile of Tankard Reist is controversial for the readership. Sunday Life is anticipating a reaction from traditional second wave and libertarian feminists. (Bible Society)

Red dress, blue dress. Danielle Meder dissects the meaning of colour in The Iron Lady. (Final Fashion)

How do you deal with feelings of intellectual inadequacy? (Ben Casnocha)

Who’s next in line for the editorships of Vogue, the New Yorker and Vanity Fair? (Ad Week)

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It’s a couple of weeks old now, but Clementine Ford’s essay on body image is full of “yes”:

Girl, you look much healthier now! Girl, stay just like this! Girl, do you think you need that second helping? Girl, you need to start watching what you eat again. Girl, you made me promise I would tell you if you ever started getting fat again and I’m just keeping my promise. Girl, don’t blame me – I’m just trying to help. (Mamamia)

Fashion celebs and their look-a-like animals. (Lost At E Minor)

Attention: “You look great! Have you lost weight?” is not a compliment. (Broadist)

Why there’s nothing wrong with wanting to be alone, Greta Garbo style. (Persephone Magazine)

Did you know Tyra Banks published a novel? About an ANTM-style modelling school in an alternative universe? I didn’t, but Ann-Derrick Gaillot has kindly reviewed it, feminist style, for our edification. (Bitch)

Some notes from inside the closet. (Notes From Inside The Closet)

Sady Doyle deconstructs the hidden class dynamics in the recent spate of “single ladies” stories. (In These Times)

I’ve been loving Natalie Perkins’ stuff on “ugly femme pride”. (Definatalie)

This NYT profile kind of made me want to be Carine Roitfeld. Make of that what you will. (New York Times)

Shit white girls say to black girls. (Youtube)

I’ve been freelancing for seven years now, and I still learnt things from this guide on how not to pitch. (The Open Notebook)

As a woman who writes (usually) serious articles for the “life and style” section, these recent meditations on why stories about women are usually relegated to - you guessed it - the “life and style” section, got me thinking. (Jessica Valenti, This Ain’t Living, We Mixed Our Drinks)

Okay, it seems like a weird argument to make, but Lee Siegal 60% won me over with his claim that we’re hell bent on desexualising Marilyn Monroe. (New York Review of Books)

Save the world, wear less clothing. (Emily D’ath)

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If you read one thing this weekend, make it Veronica Grow’s adorable and accessible (yet thought provoking!) introduction to race relations, A Kit For Uptight White People.

Chally tackles the bizarre media coverage of the severe maiming of beautiful 23-year-old Lauren Scruggs, who fractured her skull and severed her hand when she accidentally walked into the propeller of a small plane:

Women are shepherded into a box in which we’re taught our only worth is in embodying those beauty standards, in being desirable on heteronormative and otherwise narrow terms, and, increasingly, in being famous in ways that relate to this. Women are expected to do this, and feared, envied, pined for, and spat on as a result. Misogyny sets up a sword of Damocles, and the world waits until that horsehair snaps and the tension releases. People like Ms Scruggs cop the fallout: huge, international media attention directed at positioning her as a tragedy, a perfect being fallen. (Hoyden About Town)

How I write: great advice from Kate Swoboda. (Your Courageous Life)

Is friendship a feminist act? (Sociological Images)

Five easy ways readers can help out their favourite authors. (Lusty Lady)

My friend Matt Clayfield remembers one of his idols, Christopher Hitchens, beautifully:

"I had real plans for my next decade," Hitchens said not long ago, "and felt I’d worked hard enough to earn it."  I have real plans for my next decade, too, but haven’t worked hard enough to earn anything. The best way to express my solidarity today is to dedicate myself more fully to doing so. (Matthew Clayfield)

The benefits of being a blogging outsider. (Final Fashion)

Bust that ego, block out the distractions and work on something that matters. You’re not as busy as you think. (Chris Brogan)

What reality TV does to girls. (Autostraddle)

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If you read one thing this weekend, make it Hugo Schwyzer’s The Lolita Myth and the Lingering Lie of Male Weakness:

Some teens do want, or think they want, sexual attention from older men. But the reality that underage girls (be they 11 or 17) occasionally behave seductively towards older men doesn’t mean that older men can “be seduced.” The word “seduce” means “to be led away” or “to be led astray.” No adult is so weak that he (or she) is powerless to refuse sexual temptation, much less from a child. As powerful as the libido is, it is not so strong as to trump the will. (Good Men Project)

Devin Troy Strother (artwork above) knows how to throw a party on a canvas." (Lost at E Minor)

And speaking of parties, here are a bunch of photos from my recent wedding. (Belinda Dipalo Flickr)

Banking as a high impact ethical career?:

Wealth, of course, can be spent on champagne and yachts and private jets.  But it can also be spent on helping people.  In fact, there are reasons for thinking that, if you spend your money wisely, you can do much more good by taking a lucrative career such as banking than by pursuing a conventional ‘ethical’ career such as charity work. (Practical Ethics)

Can you trust the editorial integrity of style blogs? (Fashionista)

Work hard, not long: the surprisingly relaxed lives of elite achievers. (Study Hacks)

Joan Didion’s packing tips for reporting trips. (Something Changed)

Glee earned itself a ratings boost with its triple-virginity loss episode. Here’s what they got wrong, and what they got right. (How To Lose Your Virginity, Time)

Hey America, life sucks? Welcome to the real world:

She paints a picture that is bleak: young people without stable or high-salaried jobs, no disposable incomes, no safety nets. … There is a loaded implication in these statements. “It shouldn’t be like this.” This isn’t fair. It isn’t just. No, it’s not just. And yet this is what life is like for just about everyone else in the world. (Kapooka Baby)

Former Harpers editor Lewis Lapham’s revolutionary reading list. (Melville House)

The missing maternal link: I talk We Need To Talk About Kevin and maternal ambivalence in Sunday Life and the SMHAge. (Sydney Morning Herald)

The no new gifts holiday challenge. (Zen Habits)

Success is relative. (Yes and Yes)

The trouble with “it just happened” sex. (Jezebel)

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If you read one thing this weekend, make it Jess Zimmerman’s takedown of “choice feminism” - pertinent in light of recent discussions on this blog about beauty privilege and positivity. Thoughts?:

Until the woman who doesn’t want to be seen as sexually available can go out with certainty that she won’t be harassed or ogled, your choice to turn heads and revel in attention is a privileged one. Until the woman who doesn’t prioritize appearance gets taken just as seriously in just the same contexts, it’s a privileged choice to achieve certain standards of beauty. You may be doing what you love, but you’re also doing what you’re told. (xoJane)

10 top tips to stop rape. (We Mixed Our Drinks)

Tavi Gevinson interviews Leith Clark, editor of Lula. (Style Rookie)

Camilla Peffer on the similarities between top style bloggers and glossy magazine covergirls:

Fashion and beauty have always been about creating magical worlds, with control over these fantasies commanded from the top down. The Internet has given fashion and beauty lovers a place to openly share and create their own worlds, and take a little bit more control over what the media hands to us. The thing is, sometimes the pages of Tumblr aren’t that far away from the sartorial jungles of high-fashion magazines. (Girls Are Made From Pepsi)

How to improve your writing. (Forbes)

And how to build an audience for your work online. And while we’re at it, how to get invited to a writers festival. (Lisa Dempster)

Why don’t we love drag kings the way we do queens? (Rachel Rabbit White)

Why are most sitcom pilots not very funny? (AV Club)

A great big giant ass list of feminist lit. (ameliorate or destroy)

No one is too smart to worry about beauty. (Eat The Damn Cake)

And finally, MookyChick is running a competition for feminist short fiction. Go enter it. (